“Wait… Am I Even Protected?” A Real Talk Guide for LGBTQ+ Families in Nebraska

You shouldn’t have to Google “Will my kids be taken away if something happens to me?” at 2 a.m. But if you’re LGBTQ+ and living in Nebraska, chances are that thought has crossed your mind—maybe when someone casually dropped the word “custody” at a BBQ.

The reality? Nebraska law still hasn’t fully caught up to queer families. Marriage equality is the law, yes. But full recognition of LGBTQ+ parents, protection in court, and safety from discrimination? That’s still a work in progress.

Here’s what is protected under Nebraska law, what’s still a legal gray area, and what you can do to make sure your family is seen, respected, and protected.

Marriage Equality Is Just the Start—Not the Finish Line

Since the Supreme Court’s ruling in Obergefell v. Hodges (2015), same-sex couples have the legal right to marry in Nebraska. That comes with important legal benefits like:

• Joint tax filing

• Hospital visitation rights

• Inheritance rights

• Marital property protections

But Nebraska’s constitution still includes the now-unenforceable line that “marriage is between a man and a woman.” It’s outdated, but it hasn’t been removed. And some lawmakers still try to use it to chip away at LGBTQ+ protections elsewhere.

So yes, you’re legally married—but when it comes to parenting, property, and planning for the future, marriage is only part of the puzzle.

LGBTQ+ Divorce in Nebraska: What to Watch For

Nebraska is a no-fault divorce state, which means you don’t have to prove misconduct to get divorced. Courts divide property equitably (not always 50/50), and things like alimony and parenting time are considered based on need, contribution, and the best interests of the child.

But here’s where things get tricky for LGBTQ+ couples:

• Only assets acquired during the legal marriage count as marital property.

  Bought a house together before marriage equality? The equity from those pre-marriage years might not be counted.

• Parenting rights may not be equal.

  If only one parent is biologically related to the child—and there’s no second-parent adoption or court order—the non-biological parent could be treated as a legal stranger, even if they’ve raised the child since birth.

Don’t Leave Parentage to Chance

Let’s be clear: in Nebraska, the person who gives birth is the legal parent.

Even if both partners are listed on the birth certificate, that alone does not establish legal parentage. Without a second-parent adoption or parentage order, the non-bio parent may have no rights in court, no say in medical decisions, and no legal claim if you separate or something happens to the birth parent.

If you’re building your family through:

• Donor sperm

• IVF

• Surrogacy

• Reciprocal IVF

  … then you absolutely need legal protections in place.

Because while love makes a family, paperwork protects it.

Second-Parent Adoption in Nebraska: Yes, You Can (and Should)

Nebraska does allow second-parent adoption, whether you’re married or not. This process allows both parents to be legally recognized without requiring either to give up parental rights.

Yes, private or religious agencies may have their own biases—but legally, they cannot deny your right to adopt based solely on sexual orientation or gender identity. Still, having a knowledgeable LGBTQ+ family lawyer on your side can help shut down the runaround before it starts.

Using a Donor or Surrogate? Don’t Skip the Legal Agreement

Nebraska has no specific statutes governing assisted reproduction or surrogacy, which means outcomes vary widely by judge, by county, and by the facts of the case.

If you’re using a surrogate, sperm donor, or egg donor, you should:

• Work with a lawyer to create a detailed legal agreement

• Get a parentage order or pursue a second-parent adoption

• Clarify intentions in writing before your child is born

This protects you, your partner, the child, and the person helping you build your family. Assumptions don’t hold up in court—legal documents do.

Discrimination Still Happens. Legal Protection Is Your Best Shield.

Nebraska doesn’t have a statewide law that bans discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity. Some cities like Lincoln, Omaha, and Bellevue have passed local protections—but a patchwork isn’t a parachute.

Having your adoption finalized, your estate plan updated, and your parenting documents in place means you’re prepared if someone—whether it’s a school, a hospital, or even a court—fails to recognize your family as legitimate.

What You Can Do Right Now

You don’t have to fix everything at once. But if you’re looking for tangible steps to protect your family, here’s where to start:

• If you’re parenting together, get a second-parent adoption or court order confirming parentage

• If you’re using a donor or surrogate, work with a lawyer on a legal agreement

• If you’re divorced or co-parenting, make sure you have a formal parenting plan

• If your estate plan hasn’t been updated since coming out or getting married, let’s revise it

• If your family doesn’t fit a checkbox, all the more reason to protect it with clear legal documents

These aren’t just legal tools—they’re your safety net. And peace of mind is worth more than anything you’ll find in a Google template.

Your Family Deserves Legal Recognition—Not Just Tolerance

You shouldn’t have to justify your family to a judge, a form, or anyone else. You deserve to know that the people you love most will be protected—no matter what.

If you’re ready to talk through your options—or even if you’re just not sure where to start—I’m here.

Contact Zachary W. Anderson Law at 402-259-0059 or email zach@zandersonlaw.com.