How Do You Talk About a Prenuptial Agreement With Your Fiancé?
Bringing up a prenup isn’t exactly romantic. It’s not the stuff of wedding Pinterest boards or engagement photo shoots. But here’s the truth: a prenuptial agreement isn’t about predicting failure—it’s about creating clarity, fairness, and peace of mind. In Nebraska, prenups are valid and enforceable under the Nebraska Uniform Premarital Agreement Act (NUPAA) if they’re done right. The real challenge isn’t the legal document itself—it’s how you talk about it. This guide walks you through eight practical, respectful ways to bring up the conversation with your fiancé, plus answers to the questions couples ask most often. By the end, you’ll see that a prenup isn’t a sign of mistrust. It’s a sign of maturity and care for your relationship.
8 Thoughtful Tips for Talking About a Prenuptial Agreement
1. Pick the Right Moment
Timing and environment can make or break this conversation. A prenup talk shouldn’t happen during a fight, or while you’re stressed over seating charts, or five minutes before bed. Choose a calm, private setting—maybe a Saturday morning coffee at home or a walk where you can talk freely. Let your fiancé know you’d like to discuss something important so they’re mentally prepared. When both of you feel unrushed and respected, the conversation starts on the right note.
2. Be Honest About Your Intentions
Start with transparency. Share why you believe a prenup is worth considering, and keep the focus on mutual protection. For example: “I’ve been thinking about how we can protect each other and our future, and I believe a prenup could help us set clear expectations.” Whether your reasons involve family property, a business, or simply wanting clarity, honesty shows that your motivation comes from care—not control.
3. Lead With Empathy
The word “prenup” can stir up strong emotions. For some, it’s tied to mistrust or fear of divorce. Acknowledge that up front: “I know this might feel uncomfortable, but I’d like us to talk about it openly.” Then listen. Invite your fiancé to share how they feel and resist the urge to jump in with a quick fix. Sometimes being heard is more important than solving everything in one conversation.
4. Focus on Shared Benefits
A prenup isn’t about one person winning—it’s about both people being protected. It can make sure premarital debts don’t spill over, clarify what happens with a family business, and reduce uncertainty if life takes an unexpected turn. You might say: “This isn’t about expecting the worst—it’s about making sure we’re both protected and on the same page.” When you frame it as a team decision, it feels less like a demand and more like a partnership.
5. Involve Trusted Professionals
Sometimes the best move is to take the emotional weight off yourselves and bring in experts. A family law attorney or financial advisor can explain the legal side, answer questions, and make sure the agreement is fair and enforceable.
In Nebraska, courts look closely at voluntariness, timing, and fairness. That includes how close the signing was to the wedding, whether each partner had independent legal counsel, and whether there was full financial disclosure. Encouraging your fiancé to have their own lawyer isn’t a sign of conflict—it’s a sign of respect, and it strengthens the agreement.
6. Be Open to Negotiation
A healthy prenup reflects both of your values and priorities. Ask: “What matters most to you in this?” Maybe your fiancé is concerned about spousal support. Maybe they want to be sure student debt stays separate. Approach it with a willingness to compromise. Collaborating on the terms not only creates a stronger agreement—it strengthens your ability to handle other tough conversations in marriage.
7. Don’t Rush the Process
Rushing leads to resentment—and in some cases, invalid agreements. Nebraska courts are skeptical of prenups signed on the eve of a wedding because it can look like one partner was pressured. Give yourselves plenty of time to talk, think, and revise. Treat it like an ongoing dialogue instead of a deadline. You might say: “Let’s take our time with this—I want us both to feel comfortable before we sign anything.”
8. Reframe the Conversation Around Partnership
At the end of the day, a prenup isn’t about mistrust—it’s about intentional planning. Compare it to getting insurance or writing a will. Nobody buys life insurance because they expect to die tomorrow. They buy it because they care about protecting their loved ones. The same is true here. You might say: “This isn’t because I doubt us. It’s because I care about us, and I want to make sure we’re thoughtful about our future.”
Nebraska Prenup Law in Plain English
If you’re wondering whether a prenuptial agreement is valid in Nebraska, here’s what you need to know:
Prenups are legal and enforceable. Nebraska law recognizes them under the Nebraska Uniform Premarital Agreement Act (NUPAA).
They take effect when you marry. The agreement isn’t enforceable until after the wedding.
They can cover a lot. Property rights, debts, spousal support, estate planning, and even which state’s laws apply.
They can’t cover children. Custody, parenting time, and child support can’t be decided in advance.
Spousal support has limits. You can waive or limit alimony, but if doing so would leave a spouse eligible for public assistance, a court can step in and order support.
Disclosure is critical. Each partner must make a fair and reasonable disclosure of their assets, liabilities, and income. Attaching a financial disclosure exhibit to the prenup is a common practice.
FAQ: Prenuptial Agreements in Nebraska
Are prenups enforceable in Nebraska?
Yes. Courts generally uphold prenups if they’re voluntary, based on full disclosure, and fair at the time of signing.
Do we both need our own lawyer?
Not legally, but practically, yes. Independent counsel makes the agreement stronger and helps both partners feel comfortable.
Can we decide spousal support in advance?
Yes, you can—but the court can still order support if the waiver would leave someone dependent on public assistance.
What can’t we include in a prenup?
Anything about kids. Child custody and child support are always up to the court, based on the child’s best interest.
When should we start the prenup process?
As early as possible—ideally months before the wedding. Nebraska courts consider timing a key factor in voluntariness.
What if someone hides assets or debts?
The prenup could be unenforceable. Nebraska law requires “fair and reasonable disclosure.” That means both partners should share assets, liabilities, and income up front.
Can a prenup be updated later?
Yes. Life changes—kids, inheritances, new businesses—happen. You can amend or revoke a prenup at any time if both of you agree in writing.
What to Do Next
If you’re thinking about a prenup, here’s a practical first step:
Make a list of your assets, debts, and income.
Have an honest talk with your fiancé using the tips above.
Contact a qualified Nebraska family law attorney who understands the Nebraska Uniform Premarital Agreement Act.
A prenup is most effective when it’s not just a document, but a process—one that reflects both partners’ values and protects your future together.
Final Thought
Discussing a prenup won’t ever be as fun as cake tasting, but it doesn’t have to be scary either. With empathy, honesty, and the right legal guidance, it can actually bring you closer as a couple. A Nebraska prenuptial agreement isn’t about mistrust—it’s about maturity, clarity, and peace of mind.