Think “Everyone Knew What Mom Wanted” Is Enough? Think Again.
“We All Knew What Mom Wanted…”
It’s one of the most common things I hear in my estate planning practice: “We all agreed that my brother would get the house. That’s what Mom said she wanted.”
But here’s the problem—verbal wishes, even ones shared openly within the family, don’t hold up in Nebraska probate court. They’re not enforceable. And without proper legal documentation, what everyone knew quickly unravels into delays, unexpected costs, and strained relationships.
Let’s talk about what actually happens when someone dies in Nebraska without a written estate plan—and how to prevent common pitfalls.
What Happens If There’s No Will or Trust?
In Nebraska, if someone passes away without a will or trust, the law turns to the rules of intestate succession. These rules determine who inherits, regardless of what the deceased may have said or what the family believed was intended.
That means:
No verbal agreements are considered.
No “we all agreed” stories matter.
The probate court requires legally binding documents: a valid will, trust, or formal ownership/title paperwork.
Without these, even the most functional families can get tangled in a legal and emotional mess.
A Common Scenario: The House That Was “Promised”
Here’s a situation I see far too often:
A parent passes away owning a home. One adult child has been living there for years. The parent said they wanted that child to have the house. Everyone in the family agrees that was the intent.
But nothing was ever put in writing.
So what happens next?
The property goes through probate.
A personal representative must be appointed by the court, which takes time and money.
Meanwhile, the home is in limbo, and expenses start stacking up.
Who’s Responsible for Home Expenses During Probate?
This is where conflict usually starts to bubble up.
While the property is tied up in probate
Who’s paying the mortgage, taxes, and upkeep?
Should the estate cover these costs?
Is the person living there supposed to pay for everything?
Often, no one knows. The person in the house assumes the estate will cover it. The other heirs assume the person living there should handle it. The legal truth? Without written guidance, there’s no clear answer.
The Emotional Toll: Legal Fees, Personal Property, and Resentment
Eventually, when it’s time to transfer the property, someone has to pay legal fees, prepare the deed, and cover recording costs. If the estate pays, other heirs may feel they’re funding a gift to just one sibling. If the person in the home pays, it may feel like they’re being charged for something they were told they’d inherit.
Then come the arguments over personal property—furniture, heirlooms, photographs, even silverware.
If items start disappearing before probate wraps up, conflict is almost guaranteed. Families can splinter over things that were never supposed to be a fight.
The Solution: Put It In Writing
If you want someone to receive a particular asset—especially something as valuable as a home—you need to put it in a will, trust, or other legally enforceable document.
A proper estate plan:
Prevents conflict.
Saves money.
Reduces delay.
Preserves relationships.
Good estate planning in Nebraska is not about controlling from the grave. It’s about protecting the people you care about and sparing them unnecessary stress.
Already Caught in This Situation?
If your family is already dealing with uncertainty or tension around a loved one’s estate, don’t wait. The longer these situations drag out, the worse they tend to get—financially and emotionally. A probate attorney can help bring clarity, structure, and legal resolution to the table.
FAQ: Verbal Promises and Nebraska Estate Law
Do verbal promises count in Nebraska estate planning?
No. Verbal agreements or “understandings” are not enforceable under Nebraska probate law. Only written, legally valid documents—such as wills, trusts, deeds, or title designations—can direct the distribution of assets.
What is intestate succession in Nebraska?
Intestate succession is the legal process that determines who inherits when a person dies without a valid will. Nebraska law outlines a specific order of priority—typically spouse, then children, then other relatives.
Can a house be transferred without probate if there’s no will?
Not usually. If a home isn’t jointly owned or titled with a transfer-on-death deed or placed into a trust, it will generally require probate to transfer ownership.
Who pays expenses on a house during probate?
That depends. If there’s no written direction, payment responsibility is unclear and often becomes a point of conflict. The estate may cover costs, or the person living in the house may be asked to pay—neither is guaranteed.
How can estate planning help avoid family conflict?
Estate planning creates clear, legally binding instructions that remove ambiguity. It helps ensure your wishes are followed and prevents misunderstandings that often lead to resentment and legal battles.
Need Help with Nebraska Estate Planning?
Whether you’re starting your estate plan or already navigating a complicated probate situation, I’m here to help. A clear plan now means fewer problems later—and protects the people and relationships that matter most.
Call 402-259-0059 or email zach@zandersonlaw.com to schedule a consult. Let’s make sure your intentions don’t get lost in translation.